Nov 18, 2008


This morning I was on a mission. Drop kids before I needed to pick Kellen up at 12:15. Every minute mattered. Every single one.  I was actually doing well until I made that fateful stop in the laundry room, on my way out for errands, to fold one last load of towels. Thats where my day took a turn for the worse.

(Hmmm....funny how so many of my posts are about time spent in the laundry room. This should tell you 2 things: 1) I have a very boring life and 2)I spend a fair amount of it washing clothes). 

So there I was, quickly floding my clean, fluffy towels and listening to the washer fill. I was even feeling a little smug as I realized that not only was I a few minutes ahead of schedule, but that my precise timing was going to allow me to throw the stuff from the washer into the dryer before I left. My heart feeling of accomplishment growing with every moment.

Suddenly, I heard some strange noises in the distance which pulled me from my happy place. It sounded like rushing water....Maybe a little like someone was in the shower....only I was the only one home. Hmmmmm??? I pause for a moment longer, trying to figure out what it could be because now I hear another noise....a thumping the noise the sump pump in the basement makes when we are flooding.....HOLY CRAP! I tear out of the laundry room and as I do....the sound of rushing water gets louder. Its coming from the bathroom. The bathroom???? What the heck????
I switch on the light and much to my delight....the toilet is spilling laundry water all over the floor. In addition, the bathtub is also filling with bubbly liquid that smells of Tide. As fast as my legs will carry me, I run back into the laundry room to stop the washer. As I dive for the knob that will stop the spin cycle (and hopefully stop Niagra falls in the bathroom) my sweater catches on the little sensor that exists inside the door of a dryer (which tells the dryer that the door is closed and allows it to...well.... dry clothes)  and rips 
it clean off of the appliance. So now I have a flood, a broken dryer, and a crazy long piece of snagged yarn hanging off my sweater. In addition, the sump pump is still making its thumping noises in the basement....... I'm afraid to look.

I have a hunch that Tom isn't going to be too happy about this. 

I have also lost that warm fuzzy feeling of accomplishment.

After the waters receded, I assessed the damage. 
Tub, toilet and floor.....cleaner than they were before the flood.
Basement....damp but smells nice (at least now). Sump pump did its job. Yeah! (by friday it will likely smell like mildew ....or urine)
Sweater....slightly more vintage looking. I managed to creatively tuck the dangling yarn.
Schedule for my 'productive' morning......completely shot.
Dryer....silent. Broken. not working.

You may think this is the end of the story......sadly its not.

For some reason....I decided that I should try to fix the dryer. I really can't say what posessed me to take on this project. I know nothing about dryers. Perhaps I was blinded by my obsession to acheive on this day. I still had much laundry to do and was not willing to concede. hard could it be????? 

I managed to slightly lift the top off. Maybe 3 inches. Just enough to reach my beefy arm in there and feel around for the backside of the sensor button. The top of the dryer, which as you may recall, is only open like 3 inches.... is cutting off all circulation to my hand and probably making actual cuts in my arm. Suddenly...  I find the sensor with my throbbing fingers....and then listen as it drops deep into the bowels of the appliance....most likely never to be seen again. Sh*T!!!!! With much effort and wiggling.....I free my nearly amputated appendage. I did manage to pull out the box of wires that controls this sensor button.  Somehow (I'm unsure of exactly how...possibly divine intervention), I manipulated that box of wires with a screwdriver and a strategicaly placed sliver of tape . Now, the dryer runs and actually never stops....even with the door just dries and dries....unless of course you pull the screwdriver out. (which is what is holding the whole thing together.) Its very tricky. Please don't try this at home. Also, please dont' call to borrow my dryer.

Here is a photo of my handi-work. Maybe you'll agree that I should stick to nursing......


Chaffin Family said...

Oh I am sooooooo sorry, I hate days like that. I have to admit it is hard not to laugh at the way you tell your story. The picture of the dryer says it all.

To set and look at your post with the dishwasher and the dryer one after the other is sad. I hope you have a better day and may I suggest take a day off of the use of any thing with electricity. Don't even cook dinner, go out and forget about the house for a while. Kim

The Beckham 5 said...

Oh Colleen, I'm so sorry about your laundry incident today!!! I'm also sorry because I was laughing so hard while reading this! (I'm at work right now and I'm sure people are wondering what is wrong with me!!) You just describe things in a way that it's hard not to laugh! :)
If you havent told Tom yet, you should email the link to your blog and tell him that way!! Maybe it'll put a smile on his face too.
I'll pray that everything gets fixed soon and wont be too costly.
Take care,

laura bacon said...

Colleen... you're amazing!! I would have called someone to clean up the basement and Sears to fix the dryer. What a mess!! Your writing is fun to read... like candy for the soul! Keep it up!! Also, I'm with Kim. Take a day off, get out of the house, don't even think about household chores for a while!!

blended by grace said...

Oh man! I think Santa should give you the gift of merry maids in your stocking this year! And maybe a handyman service...

Kelli Rydeen and Family said...

You deserve a massage after this one! You tell your story with such hilarity that I am hoping by this time you are at least somewhat amused by it as well?

And props to you for the Tim the toolman Taylor jimmy rig of the dryer that is very impressive.

I can relate to your high hopes for your day, to only have them dashed before even leaving the house; such is the life of a Mom.


akbyrd said...

Can I come & live in your house for a week? Just for the sheer laughter that happens around there. You are hilarious. I'll be sure to remember your screwdriver trick if I ever have a morning like that.

mholgate said...

Coleen, you are too funny! I'm glad that you can at least get a laugh out of it, even if it did ruin your warm fuzzies. We had something like that happen in our basement bathroom also. Apparently our pipes were clogged by some of the many wipes that a child not to be named here flushed down the toilet. The guy had to saw a hole in my floor in order to get down to the section of pipe that was clogged and I had to use my shop vac to get all the water out of our basement!

Thanks for stopping by my blog. Glad to re-connect with you! : )

jessithompson said...

I'm still in shock and AWE that you actually tried to fix the dryer and it sort of works. That's amazing. And the whole story (although I'm sure a major pain in the butt) is HILARIOUS! Thanks for the laugh! :)

Smith Family said...

Dear Mcgyver~
You completed this challenge with flying colors. Next week I will send you your next mission, if you choose to except it. Your only hint is that it will probably occur in your laundry room. Be on guard.

McMurrays said...

I laughed out loud. .. you are a hysterical writer! Thanks for bringing some good laughs today. . you completely crack me up!

Shawn, Laura, and Kellie said...

Ditto to all of the above!

Joey Veltkamp said...

Yeah, you need to stop the nursing and devote that time to writing. Join a writing club or something. You're really, really great!

LBB said...

Awesome! Your posts always make me laugh!

Have a happy turkey day!


Kim said...

Oh my goodness! LOVE IT! I say Sears baby...front loader! XOXO